Kinky,Curly Hair: The Musical!
disclaimer: as always, I’m speaking from my own experiences so don’t be mad
Act 1: Childhood
Like most kinky curly women I know, I grew up getting my hair done at home, just about every week. This involved one of my family members taking down the style they put in a week or two ago, washing & conditioning my hair, and re-braiding, twisting or poofing my hair for my next style. Although I did not see it then, shit, I see now that I was living the dream. Got my hair done at home, for the free, and I got to pick out my fav scrunchies, hair clips and everything - oh to be young again. Point is, someone always held it down for me when I was a kid getting my hair done and because of that I never “knew how to do my hair” until muuuuch later in life.
Fun activity: if you swap the word “zombie” out for “relaxer” you’ll see why I chose this song - your hair never stood a chance
Act 2: The Destruction Phase
OK lets fast forward a bit to the teenage years. I just can’t be bothered with styling my hair myself and again, like most kinky curly women I know, this is where I done fucked. up. Did someone say Relaxer ? Yup, or creamy crack as some like to call it, completely destroyed my hair - like my hair has never the same again. (not dramatic, just the truth). These insane chemicals wrecked my beautiful, thick hair and for what?! Wash and sets every 2 weeks? In the salon for hours? And years later my curl pattern is still complicated af?? *kisses teeth*
I’m not one for dwelling on the past but it is interesting that a lot of us made the decision to relax our hair, or at least tried to straighten it using extreme heat and manipulation that ended up hurting us for years to come. And I know I don’t need to tell y’all that European “beauty standards” are dangerous and destructive. And they don’t have shit to do with us.
Anyways, just know that a combination of laziness, lack of understanding of myself, and mainstream media resulted in me being bald-headed for far too long.
Act 3: Enlightenment
Alright so I’m no Whitney White (Naptural85 on YouTube who helped bring me out the darkness of Act 2) but I can pull off a nice twist out or wash n go when needed. More importantly, I understand my hair, the different textures it has, and how best to take care of it. I still have a lot to learn but just being comfortable in my abilities to style and care for my own hair is huge! I know I’m an adult and this may seem weird but as I mentioned my hair journey involved a lot of trial and error and I learned from a lot of the wrong places. And let’s not forget that the media still does not highlight kinky curly hair enough. A lot of women my age, including me, wear their hair in protective styles like box braids or wigs but rarely does their natural hair get to see the light of day. It’s easier said than done but I want to encourage people with kinky curly hair to embrace the hair that grows from their head naturally and own it. Lemme see yah naps! Fuck it, don’t slick down your edges. Be. Natural.